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I have strange coincidences happen but I don't believe in coincidences now synchronicity I do indeed. This is going to be a ramble so bear with me...
Now I am single I find myself with much more time alone than I am used to. This is not necessarily a bad thing but I do tend to crawl up into my head far too much before. Now I am finding myself in the attic of my mind.
I am trying not to read too much into the actions of others that are circling around in the orbits of my life. I keep finding shit gets weird, interesting and typically has something fun for me to figure out after it is all said and done. Right now I am just trying to figure out the intent of my heart, what it wants and what others want from it as well...
Women have such big hearts, but are chaotic dark storms trapped in beautiful bodies and incredibly complex minds. They do not wish to hurt you, yet they do not often know what they want or when they want it let alone what you might want! Spontaneity was invented by a woman and time can often be a foreign concept because of this. Often I find myself along these rides with a person I like because they are interesting, nice to look at accompanied with a pleasant and intoxicating aroma, but am I subjecting myself to something out of fear of that lone void that parts of my life have become? Now I like to just jump trains as much as the next chap, but sometimes you just want a nice ride with the motion that puts you comfortably to sleep not a F*cking roller-coaster death-car hell bound at ever corner!
Do I hide under my desk out of fear of the terror temblor heart-bleed rides or do I just keep chugging along hoping for that long mountain ride with spectacular scenery? Advice? Or are you confused too?
And with that I bid adieu for now...
Now I am single I find myself with much more time alone than I am used to. This is not necessarily a bad thing but I do tend to crawl up into my head far too much before. Now I am finding myself in the attic of my mind.
I am trying not to read too much into the actions of others that are circling around in the orbits of my life. I keep finding shit gets weird, interesting and typically has something fun for me to figure out after it is all said and done. Right now I am just trying to figure out the intent of my heart, what it wants and what others want from it as well...
Women have such big hearts, but are chaotic dark storms trapped in beautiful bodies and incredibly complex minds. They do not wish to hurt you, yet they do not often know what they want or when they want it let alone what you might want! Spontaneity was invented by a woman and time can often be a foreign concept because of this. Often I find myself along these rides with a person I like because they are interesting, nice to look at accompanied with a pleasant and intoxicating aroma, but am I subjecting myself to something out of fear of that lone void that parts of my life have become? Now I like to just jump trains as much as the next chap, but sometimes you just want a nice ride with the motion that puts you comfortably to sleep not a F*cking roller-coaster death-car hell bound at ever corner!
Do I hide under my desk out of fear of the terror temblor heart-bleed rides or do I just keep chugging along hoping for that long mountain ride with spectacular scenery? Advice? Or are you confused too?
And with that I bid adieu for now...
My Unbreakable heart
It beats still in my chest I suppose
a faint and half-hearted echo in repose
known by too much sorrow and pain
how long does it last with no gain
hearts are such fragile toys
This one that no longer knows joys
Wish someday it might stop so I can go on
let the past die, shrivel and be gone
Can I function within an emptiness unshakable?
while still my heart remains unbreakable?
A year of Hell and then some...
In the past year and few months I went through some of the most traumatic events in my life so far. I will always remember it as the year of Hell!
I have had some good experiences but the past 7 months has taken its toll on me, as I have watched my world basically fall apart. I set in motion a series of events thinking back it is a bit of we reap what we have sown. I realize I am not to blame for all of the events that have transpired but at some point it has get good right?
Things I never thought in my wildest dreams I would have to deal with and such personal loss I am left to wonder is this the bottom?
Normally I am a bit of a pessimist
Have I forgotten?
Or perhaps I have half-Heartedly chosen to no longer remember who I am?
Maybe that is the interesting thing about being human? That although I cannot change many physical traits I can change who I am...but fundamentally? I am not talking about just changing my mind or how I react to things no this is the core or better still the Heart of the matter. How to change ones Heart...? How do I change my Heart?
Is such a personal alchemical feat possible?
Hmmm well any invocation must come from a start, either with the head or from the Heart. It must be pure, just and a kindly piece of art. It must grow becoming more than written word or spoken de
Until I reach the ocean.
She says we are all wet inside and you should learn to dive deeper...
I took a full breath as I swam inside her beauty beneath the penetrating rays of the morning light. We tussle like otters over a prized oyster rolling and frolicking between the surf colored sheets. As mercurial as she usually is, today her logic was slippery, uneasy to grasp and her waves were crashing into me.
Its not whether you can hold your breath the whole time either she says...sometimes you need to drown so that you understand you are meant to be a fish or a dolphin or whale. You have spent to much time on the land and forgot where your came from, who you are, you
© 2014 - 2024 VileYonderboy
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